I haven’t heard much about Swine flu this week, or really about anything that is actually news.  What I have heard is that Obama is funny, and also that hamburger condiments are now a values issue.

Last night was the annual White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner - an event where Stephen Colbert famously roasted Bush and the whole administration to a rather uncomfortable audience, who apparently don’t watch his show.  And it seems that Obama overshadowed Wanda Sykes’ keynote just a bit, as it’s his jokes that are getting most of the attention:

Dick Cheney was among the Washington elite not in attendance.  The former vice president was busy, President Barack Obama joked, working on his memoir "tentatively titled, How to Shoot Friends and Interrogate People.’ "

His chief of staff, Rahm Emanuel, Obama observed, always has a hard time on Mother’s Day. "He’s not used to saying the word ‘day’ after ‘mother,’" Obama said.

To Michael Steele, chair of the RNC: "Michael for the last time, the Republican Party does not qualify for a bailout," Obama told Steele. "Rush Limbaugh does not count as a troubled asset, I’m sorry."

He’s the president, people… he can afford good writers!

Of course, the real news was blown open by the likes of Sean Hannity & co., and makes your blood run cold.  Apparently a few days ago, President Obama ordered a cheeseburger with… it’s almost too terrible to say it… dijon mustard instead of ketchup.  So that’s why he was so funny at the Correspondents’ dinner.  He had to try to distracte us from the fact that he hates America.  Seriously, the fact that three separate shows felt the need to criticize the man’s condiment choice is proof positive that we do not need 24 hour news networks.  When you have nothing important to say… just shut the hell up.

Of course, what do I know?  I’m a vegetarian… Gosh… can you imagine what they would say about an openly vegetarian president?  Suddenly Boca Burgers would be equal to the plague of locusts.